Hunger

Heartbreaking, relatable, raw. For anyone who's ever been overweight - really overweight, not 5 or 10 or 25 pounds (and for those of you who love or care about someone who's obese) this book is a must-read. Ms. Gay describes so clearly, so evocatively, the simultaneous, often-confounding push-pull of being fat in America - how we hate our bodies, yet are irritated and frustrated by America telling us that we should in fact hate our bodies; that we wish with every fiber in us that our bodies were different, yet how deeply we also wish we could just accept our bodies, flawed & dimpled & fat as they are. I've long admired Ms.Gay's brilliant writing, and love that she's both a feminist and an avid watcher of bad TV and delights in her youthful (and lingering?) addictions to Sweet Valley High and other silly series. (Hey, what a concept - we can be both feminists and excitedly watch The Bachelorette every week...) She lays out her personal story in this book with such raw, unflinching candor. It's painful at times to read it, like we've been caught reading her journal entries, but it's a pain that all of us who are fat have felt or feel every single day. A rare, wonderful, poignantly personal memoir that connects her personal struggles and trauma to the larger (pun intended) American obsession with being thin, and the price that overweight and obese Americans (especially women) pay with every breath, every movement, every heavy, aching step that we take in public spaces. For those who judge, who would look at Ms. Gay and say "why didn't she...?" or "why doesn't she...?" or "what about.....", read this first and hopefully blow open your pre-conceived notions about how "easy" it would be to do x, y, z, to release yourself from a cage of your own making.

Gay has thought and thought and thought about the events of her life and where those events have taken her and she's very honest about what she is responsible for, what she is not responsible for, her feelings, the feelings of those around her, etc. For those reasons in combination with her adept writing, it's a good read. I did find myself wanting to talk with her at times because there were a few areas that I felt she had blinders on or made easy excuses, which seemed at odds with her clearly self aware and self critical persona. Her discussion on why exercise isn't her solution, for example, seemed pretty flippant and again, at odds with her persona. She basically says she's too lazy and feels intimidated going to the gym. Well, don't we all? Also, I don't think 'lazy' is the right word for someone like Gay who has clearly worked hard and excelled at many other facets in her life. It seemed like an easy write-off. The other issue that had similar 'write-off' tones was when she described that she was a vegetarian until she became too anemic and 'had to eat meat again.' Sounded like a really convenient excuse instead of her otherwise self-reflective and honest analysis of her life and coping mechanisms. Too anemic? Cook with a cast iron pot. Too anemic? Take iron supplements. I had to keep reminding myself, this is a memoir and so it is not held up to judgement in the way that perhaps an expert writing a self-help book should be held to fact. With that in mind, it was a good book, just a bit frustrating that while she is a great writer, a person you want to meet and be friends with, she also clearly has some blinders still in front of her.

That is my own measly opinion, of course. I think this book left people confused on either end of the spectrum, in different ways. I've read 1-star ratings calling it boring, disappointing, circular, with no light at the end of the tunnel; the memoir of a very unlikable human being who gets nowhere in this book. Like it's meant to be some kind of fairy tale, or the lesson to be learned is meant to leave the reader feeling accomplished and good. Like wisdom always feels good or something. Or the 5-star ratings that praise this as though it's this suspenseful and emotionally captivating read—which I personally feel is misleading and such a misrepresentation of why this book exists. "LOVE IT!!!" feels cheap. Calling this book amazing feels like a lie. When I started reading Hunger, I knew I was going into a memoir that was probably going to feel very uncomfortable; both in just reading about the real trauma a real person had experienced, and the fact that I have also suffered trauma. I am also obese and have experienced the fear of losing weight for the same reasons the author has and does. I get it and I felt myself bearing down and then a dull sense of disturbance fill my stomach as I got closer to what I knew lived in the pages of this memoir. I read a life that seemed very similar to mine; at a certain point I even felt a sting of annoyance that someone wrote down my story and got the success that I probably could've had a long time ago. I lived this life, in my own ways—so much of it was terribly familiar to me. Some moments mirrored my own, and some situations I couldn't even begin to imagine myself in. I'm wondering if those who got nothing out of this really missed the point of what Roxane's memoir is. She's not here to teach us a moral, or to leave us feeling empowered in our obesity, or giving anyone a sense of moral high ground. This memoir reads as a practice in pure catharsis—an attempt at validating her own traumas and seeing how it latched onto her and changed her perception of herself. It's not about the reader and really whatever they're hoping to get out of it; Roxane is showing us the very experiences that closely reflect those similar to her. Yes, it is redundant because trauma doesn't just go away. Trauma follows and manifests over and over again, however the brain makes it until the person is able to resolve it. That resolution, though?—sometimes it never shows up. Sometimes, trauma looks like decades of just eating, chatting online, the same list of stupid choices, failed jobs and grades, evictions, severed relationships, and the same relationships that hurt someone the first time the trauma happened. Years upon years of the same BS, neverending. Always going. And for an obese person—an obese woman of color—Roxane Gay's memoir is chronic and endemic, and it's deeply disturbing and can feel the reader with hopelessness. Some readers found this book boring because it just repeated the same things over and over. They lost interest. They ask, "What is in this for me? I want my money back! DO NOT READ, EVERYONE." If this book is anything, it is a practice in empathy for those whose lives have been debilitated and left in Limbo by the foul choices of others—even children, as Roxane Gay had been victim to. And in saying that, I will say that from my perspective, the people complaining about how bored they were and how disappointed that they didn't get any helpful advice or "wisdom" out of this memoir completely failed in that practice. Welcome to trauma. Welcome to sexual trauma. Welcome to rape. Welcome to PTSD. Welcome to eating disorders. And welcome to all of those things, wrapped up into a life that spent years being unresolved, misunderstood, unnoticed, invalidated, and left to rot—all because anyone could see was that Roxane Gay was fat.

A very powerful memoir of a young girl's reaction to a very traumatizing experience. Very honest, and well written. I was just sorry that I never felt that the emotional injury coupled with the early physical attack was ever resolved. Eating to " stuff down" the painwas her way to deal with her trauma. I hope that other readers will feel her pain, and will learn from it to speak out to parents or helpers. She buried her pain and then Buried it deeper and deeper beneath layers of fat. A wonderful read and many lessons to be learned.

I read this book within 2 days. It is written in such a raw and painfully honest way that makes it impossibly to stop reading. Roxane Gay shares her very personal story and addresses the topics of sexual abuse, race- and gender-equality, loneliness and obesity in today's society. She gives insight into her most intimate experiences as a black, morbidly obese, and traumatized, but extremely strong and intelligent woman. I highly recommend this book for anyone who is interested in topics such as gender equality, human rights, racism, feminism, (sexual) abuse and trauma, eating disorders, society, etc.

Tutto ok

Fantastic book. Reading Roxanne’s memoir seemed like travelling through my own mind. Her dichotomies are so relatable. I’m not fat but I didn’t feel any different from her. Quite like her we too are prisoners of our own expectations. The book pushes us in a corner to think, really think if we want to curtail our happiness to accommodate unrealistic standards set by a group of people.

Témoignage poignant de la genèse de l’obésité dans une évènement traumatique lors de l’adolescence et de la réalité à affronter à l’âge adulte. Impressionnant et très touchant par le dévoilement de ce qui reste tabou dans la société.