Secret Daughter: A Novel

"Mother India does not love all her children equally, it seems". Secret Daughter highlights the practice of preferring boys over girls, leading to infanticide or abandonment of baby girls. The story immediately drew me in with an intense, visceral depiction of Usha's birth by her biological mother. The story focuses on three memorable characters: (1) Kavita, the biological mother, from a destitute, rural Indian village. Her story is heartbreaking, and she suffers so much that it's sometimes unbearable to read, but she is incredibly strong, a resilient survivor. (2) Somer, the American adoptee mother, from Menlo Park, CA, a working mother and pediatrician who suffers in her own way through infertility and estrangement from her own family. Finally (3) Asha, born as Usha, the daughter who is "saved" from an orphan's life of poverty and adopted by Somer and her Indian husband. I found that while Somer was by far the easiest to relate to, she was often the hardest to be sympathetic towards. Even the minor characters are fascinating. I particularly enjoyed Sarla, Asha's Indian grandmother, who is a strong matriach figure and has significant influence on Asha.The story explores many complex themes - identity, cross-cultural adoption, what makes a family, what does it mean to be a mother, a daughter, poverty and the growing split between rich and poor, working mother identity - and yet it is not heavy or off-putting. India itself is another important character, the beauty and contradictions, the extremes of dire poverty and open-arms welcoming society. Although I've never been to India, Somaya Gowda describes its sights, smells, sounds, and life there in such a way that I felt as if I had walked the streets, ate the food, and gone to weddings there.The story is beautifully written. I often found myself pausing to savor the choice of words, the phrasing, the wisdom in the words. I don't often get so engrossed in a book that I couldn't put it down, but I finished Secret Daughter in two nights and had to force myself to put the book down to get some sleep. The ending is not a Hollywood ending, and is very satisfying. I highly recommend this book - read it before it is made into a movie! I look forward to discussing this with my book club.

This is the story of two families, American and Indian. Somer and Krishnan met while in school, fell in love and married. Krishnan assimilated completely to American life, rarely visiting India in the 20 years since he left. Somer made no effort to learn about her husband's culture, and has only once visited his family. Both physicians, they adopted a baby from India when they learned that they couldn't have children of their own. Kavita and Jasu were a young couple living in poverty in India. When Kavita gave birth to their first child, a daughter, Jasu took the child away and presumably killed her. Brokenhearted by this, she made arrangements to give her second child up for adoption when she learned that it was a girl as well. Asha is adopted by Somer and Krishnan, grows up in America, and only when she is grown does she decide to take a year off of school to work in India and meet her Indian family. This precipitates a crisis in Somer and Krishnan's marriage, and Somer moves out to work through her feelings about motherhood and her relationships with her husband and daughter.Secret Daughter is very readable; however, I found a number of aspects of the book hard to believe. These include Krishnan's complete American assimilation; that he almost never visited his family; that Somer made absolutely no effort to learn anything about her husband's culture; that she was so shocked by aspects of Indian culture when they did visit; and that her friendship with a few women who did yoga was all it took to help her overcome her fears and get in shape. At the same time, I found Asha's actions and curiosity about her biological family, and the relationships she forms with her adopted Indian relatives, credible and touching. Overall, this was a good first novel that illuminates the differences in culture and how we might embrace and transcend them.

Shows the reality of life and the struggles of a society and personal choices. Voices that are heard only in your mind and unable to vocalise, the powerlessness of a man, at the same time the strength of a woman

Let me wipe my tears away to review this stunner of a book. While it had moments slightly contrived, the soul and humanity it exudes are deeply, deeply compelling. It tackles so many sweeping and complicated issues - international and interracial adoption and marriage, sex selection and preference in birth, the pain of adoption and loosing children in general, the kind of free-floating feeling of being disconnected from one's heritage, poverty... And it does all of this from an incredibly personal and authentic set of perspectives. One thing I really loved was the complexity of the two marriages it follows. Both were given ample time to both fall apart and be rebuilt in such different and yet similar ways; both threads were so true to the real challenges that face all of us in relationship. Our imperfection as humans, how our mistakes and failings impact those we love... And how our foundational love can draw us through even the most shattering moments of division. I really couldn't put this one down. Do yourself a favour, and read it. It's worth it.

I absolutely loved that book. I read it in 2 days ! It is well-written and is a nice way to discover India. A very touching story.

Ein faszinierender Roman, der die Konflikte aus zwei Welten aufzeigt.Für mich als "Adoptivmuter" besonders interessant. Ich habe das Buch verschlungen.

It graps you from the very beggining. Very nice and well written. You get to love the characters of the story...